The Big Day is upon us

Tomorrow is the Day we leave for North Carolina , I cant wait, although there are last minute things that have to be done , like packing Blaks cloths , its funny I think that old saying is true , a man forgets how to dress his self when he has a woman , in this case its he has forgotten how to pack his own cloths , thehhehe ,Im not as nervous as I was , I was so scared that something would go wrong and we wouldnt get to go , or that when we got there , Blak wouldnt want me to come back with him , My head was filled with all kinds of what if 's and I was reacting in a bad way , finally Blak made me tell him what was going on so I sat down and told him my fears , and of course I was laughed at , Sometimes I get so Scared , that this is all a dream , that I will wake up and Blak wont be there or that he wont want me to be in his life anylonger ,I know these may sound like unfounded fears but really they are not. I try not to let my past enterfear with my now but sometimes it comes rushing in and slaps me in the face telling me to not let my guard down all the way that Im going to get hurt once again, but I shake it off because NOW is NOT my past and he is not who is in my past , he is not who put all these fears and abuse in my head, he is not the one that has ever told me that I would never be good enough for any man to want to spend the rest of his life with ,, he is NOT the one that told me that the only thing I was good for was to be a mans bedwhore. Each time Blak talks of the future its OUR future not just his or mine but OuRs , that right there should tell me that Iam a part of him (smiles). Enough of this , Ive let out too much this day , and Mr.Snorei is still in there cutting Z's , Will miss Everbody while we are gone , althougth I will have my laptop , I dont have everyones emails or IM, so I will talk to everyone when we get Back ,, Love you all